为何人总是要埋怨？[2月4日专题信息]

专题信息｜为何人总是要埋怨？

2月4日

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朱志山牧师

经文: 出16:2-3，8；民21:4-7；腓2:12-15，17，21-22，25-27

课题: 人的心灵, 成圣/分别为圣/基督生活体系, 言语, 情绪, 人际医治,

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有一些事情，我们在生活中习惯性的做，却没有问是否是健康的，久而久之就成为了一种不好的体质。其中一样就是埋怨。其实，埋怨、发牢骚、发怨言、责怪人、起争论、说出种种不满的话都是我们人在生活中常做的事。有些人在工作上常常埋怨老板与同事；有些夫妇在家中对彼此与孩子发出很多牢骚；有些信徒在服侍当中也会落入发怨言的光景。一个人埋怨有很多的理由。有的看起来是无害的（只是要表达自己的一些感触），有的却是显示一个人已经来到了底线（若他的情况在不改变，他便要作出一些很激烈的举动。例如：辞掉工作、离开教会等）。所以，那严重性也不一样。另外，有些人的埋怨是一种“求助法”，听起来是他在责怪有些人，但其实他是希望人能够来理解他或者帮助他，另外，有一些人只是将埋怨当做一种心里发泄，就如说出来好受，能有人担当就好了。再就是，也有些人是口里不埋怨，但内心埋怨，这样的人因为心里常累积消极的意念，因此容易得到抑郁。在这些种种理由中，我们有否问过圣经怎么说呢？其实，即便我们有很多埋怨的理由，甚至也可能当做是一种“情绪管理法”，圣经从头到尾没有一句话是认同人埋怨或是以发牢骚来解忧。当以色列民埋怨上帝与摩西时，他们都倒毙在旷野了。有时，我们不禁会认为神为何这么严厉。并且人就是有需要才会埋怨。话虽如此，但若我们看到这埋怨的民族在走旷野的道路时，他们对神的带领越来越感到疑惑。然后，他们越来越脆弱。与其在面对挑战当中专心的依靠主，他们直接的方法就是转向摩西，向他埋怨，好像是要从他身上得着什么。他们无形当中就将摩西当做他们的“解决法”，不建立起专一依靠神的生命。最后，整个神民族类就变成一种很凡俗与无助的子民，唯有用埋怨来使唤彼此的民族。确实，这并非圣民的体统，也不是神给予祂子民的文化。试问，我们的家庭运作是变得这样吗？我们与肢体的关系是落入埋怨彼此的光景吗？我们在公司里上班是常常以埋怨来带出我们的不满，然后盼望能透过埋怨得着一些好处或减轻工作负担吗？试想我们埋怨之后，我们内在的生命到底建造了什么？所以，即便我们有我们处理问题与情绪的方式，且多年来形成了一种“埋怨体质”，我们在基督里蒙恩之后一定要回到神给予我们圣民的尊荣和方法。虽然圣经告诉我们要互相担当彼此的重担（我们也的确要坦诚相对，向彼此说出我们的想法、挣扎或是冤屈，好为彼此着想），但圣经没有认同我们以“怨气”来解忧或是使唤旁边的人。所以，圣经说：凡所行的，都不要发怨言、起争论，使你们无可指摘，诚实无伪，在这弯曲悖谬的世代做神无瑕疵的儿女。《腓2:14-15》

We habitually do certain things, but we never ask if they are healthy, and as time goes by, it becomes a bad nature in us. One of them is grumbling. Actually, grumbling, throwing frustration, lamenting, blaming others, arguments, and saying things that show our displease, are things we often do in life. Some people often grumble about the boss and colleagues at work; some couples complain to one another and children at home; some believers also fall into the complaining state as they serve. There are many reasons why one grumbles. Some may seem harmless (only to express some of their feelings), while some people’s grumblings show that he has reached his threshold (if his conditions remain unchanged, he will do more bizarre things, eg quitting, leaving the church etc). Therefore, the degree of severity is also different. Besides, some people grumble as a “way of asking for help”, it may sound as if he is blaming some people, but actually he is hoping that someone can come, understand and help him. Besides, some people treats grumbling as a kind of venting, as if it feels better after venting, and someone can shoulder it together. Besides, some may not grumble with their lips, but they grumble in their hearts, and they are easily depressed for they have accumulated many negative thoughts. Admists these reasons, have we ever asked what does the Bible say? Despite our many reasons of grumbling, or we even treat is as a way to “manage our emotions”, the Bible has never approved grumbling or complaining as the way to resolve worries, from the beginning to the end. When the Israelites grumbled against God and Moses, they died in the wilderness. Sometimes, we may feel that God is very strict, as it is normal for people to grumble. Though it sounds logical, but if we are to look into the Israelites’ journey in wilderness, they were increasingly doubtful towards God’s leading. After that, they became more fragile. Instead of depending on the Lord wholeheartedly in the face of challenges, their direct response was to turn to Moses and grumbled against him, as if they could get something from him. Unknowingly, they had regarded Moses as their “solution”, not establishing a life that solely depends on God. In the end, the whole nation became a very typical and helpless people, only using grumbling to direct one another. In fact, this is not the way of saints, and this is not the culture that God has given to His people. Have our family become like this? Has our relationship with brethren reduced to such a state? Do we often bring out our dissatisfaction at work through grumbling, and hoping through it we can reap some benefits or have lightened works? After we have grumbled, what have we built in our inner life? Therefore, though we have our ways in dealing with issues, and they have become a kind of “grumbling nature” over the years. After we have received grace in Christ, we must return to the dignity and method that God has given to His people. Although the Bible tells us to share each other’s burdens (of course, we do need to be sincere with one another, and express our ideas, struggles, grievances, so that we can be considerate to each other), the Bible has never approved us to solve problems or direct others using our “grievances”. Therefore, the Bible says: Do everything without grumbling or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, “children of God without fault in a warped and crooked generation <Php 2:14-15>.

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